Do you know the world's smallest kingdom?

‘Romkerhall, in the Harz Mountains,’ my brother-in-law Elmar replied boredly. ‘At least that's what they say. But it's not true. This kingdom is a fake, an invention of resourceful merchants, a publicity stunt, pure fantasy and nothing else. But knowing you, I'm sure you'll try to foist something about Sardinia on me.’

Elmar was proud to have travelled to over 100 countries in his life as a tourist, and he had accumulated a considerable amount of factual knowledge in the process. It was virtually impossible to stump him with questions about geography. He was quick to google the topic and triumphantly clarified: ‘It doesn't exist in Sardinia either. It hasn't for 150 years!’

In fact, the Kingdom of Sardinia has a long and eventful history. It began in 1239, and – believe it or not – with a German emperor as its godfather. This role was taken on by Frederick II, grandson of the legendary Barbarossa from the Staufer dynasty. Like all crowned heads at that time (and today?), he had one or two love affairs alongside his wife. What seems highly reprehensible to us today was by no means considered indecent at the time. On the contrary, it was perfectly acceptable. Emperors were allowed to whore around without restraint.

Be that as it may, in the pill-free Middle Ages, such activities did not remain without consequences, and so emperors and kings found themselves surrounded not only by legitimate heirs but also by numerous ‘bastards’. These often fared very badly, because the shame of illegitimate birth fell only on the mothers of the children, while the fathers, beyond the shared responsibility that is taken for granted today, remained completely unscathed. Gretchen's fate in ‘Faust’ is one example of this, but so is the tragic story of Kaspar Hauser. Heinz (Enzio), the illegitimate son of Frederick II, was really lucky, though. As a well-liked bastard, he even hit the jackpot: his dad set up the Kingdom of Sardinia for him and crowned him the first king in 1239.

There is no need to elaborate here on the fact that things did not go particularly well for him after that. (This is more the rule than the exception for those who have acquired exorbitant wealth.) In any case, Sardinia became a monarchy from then on and remained so under changing dynasties. In 1720, Sardinia gained Piedmont, and when the Sardinian King Victor Emmanuel II became the first Italian king in 1861, the Kingdom of Sardinia, with Turin as its capital, expanded across the whole of Italy! However, from then on it was called the ‘Kingdom of Italy’.

‘Strictly speaking,’ Elmar summed up, "your kingdom of Sardinia actually existed until 1946. That's when the king was kicked out by referendum because he had made a pact with Mussolini. But you can twist and turn it any way you like: this kingdom was never small, certainly not the smallest, and it no longer exists! You'll have to come up with something else if you want to lead me astray."

We were sitting together in Budoni at the Tavernetta. (This is my favourite restaurant because it serves the best moscardini alla diavola and is located right on the most beautiful part of Budoni beach.) I pointed to a rocky islet rising out of the sea to the north. My brother-in-law had to pass on the question of whether he knew the island. ‘This is my first time here with you, so I don't have to know everything,’ he replied pointedly.

"That's Tavolara. You must have noticed it when you flew into Olbia. Six kilometres long, up to one kilometre wide and almost 600 metres high. Until the Americans left a few years ago, most of it was a restricted military area. No one knows exactly what goes on there. Officially, NATO maintains a telecommunications and interception centre there. My Sardinian friends, on the other hand, insist that the island has an underwater harbour. They say that strange ships are sometimes seen there, and that when you approach the island from the east, inconspicuous “fishing boats” unmistakably urge you to get lost."

My brother-in-law found this extremely interesting. His curiosity was piqued and he wanted to know more. ‘Fishermen have lived here since the Stone Age. However, the island is so barren that only a few people can live here. Today, there are twenty, all descended from the Bertoleoni family. They came from Corsica and took possession of the island towards the end of the Napoleonic Wars.’

‘Exactly,’ I interjected, "and now we come to the point. In 1836, the King of Sardinia visited Tavolara to hunt wild goats. When he set foot on the island, he was in for a big surprise. He had not expected to encounter people on this inhospitable island. Even less did he imagine being greeted by Bertoleoni's son in this way:

‘The King of Tavolara welcomes the King of Sardinia and wishes him a pleasant stay in his kingdom.’ Carlo Alberto was impressed by the proud demeanour. Spontaneously, he gave Bertoleoni the entire island. However, knowing the transience of verbal promises, he had the right to his ‘kingdom’ certified. Since then, the rulers of the island have added an ‘I’ or “II” to their names, as befits true potentates. Anyone can see this for themselves in the island cemetery.

This is the world's smallest kingdom! No fake, no publicity stunt, no fantasy!

With a Sardinian ‘Adiosu’, I bid you farewell for today.

Joachim Waßmann